Life Explained

On the first day, God created the dog and said:

'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark
at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this,
I will give you a life span of twenty years.'

The dog said:

'That's a long time to be barking.
How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?'

So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said:

'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh.
For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.'

The monkey said:

'Monkey tricks for twenty years?
That's a pretty long time to perform.
How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?'

And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said:

'You must go into the field with the farmer
all day long and suffer under the sun,
have calves and give milk to support
the farmer's family. For this,
I will give you a life span of sixty years.'

The cow said:

'That's kind of a tough life you want me to
live for sixty years. How about twenty
and I'll give back the other forty?'

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said:

'Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life.
For this, I'll give you twenty years.'

But man said:

'Only twenty years?
Could you possibly give me my twenty,
the forty the cow gave back,
the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten
the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?'

'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.'

So that is why for our first twenty years
we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves.
For the next forty years
we slave in the sun to support our family.
For the next ten years
we do monkey tricks to entertain
the grandchildren.
And for the last ten years
we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me
for this valuable information.
I'm doing it as a public service.


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