Dear Billy Jo Bob,

 Don't ya pay no attenson to thet thar lady Mary Jane who done writ to ya. She sounds like a darn jelous home wrecker ta me.

Yer Carolyn has been one good wemen, and she done told me she luvs ya all ta peces.

If'n ya want ta, my man done sed he wud be glad ta give ya sum advise on how ta be a good husban. He says he thinks ya got sum pootensial. I relly do to cuz my man says mariage is give n' take. Carolyn says she duz a lot of givn' and you do the takin' Do you think thet is what my man ment?

Also you gotta quit doin' all thet mberassin' stuff.

How is your butt heelin' up where the bear bit ya. If you was usin' the outhouse like Carolyn done told ya, the bear wouldn'ta bit ya.

Hee- Hee-Hee.  Ya gotta admit ther shur is a bit of humor in thet.

My husban says he shur don't know how ya have kep from getting' poison  when ya are always poopin' in the weeds.

I know ya think I must be jus a nosy ol' busy body, but Carolyn an I done ben bes frends for many yers now an she tells me she luvs ya with all her hart. She done sed it makes her fel so bad when ya'll  fite.

Carolyn done told me the oter day she was gonna saprise ya

on saterday nite. She is gonna clean up an make ya yur faverite meal of possum pie. She told me she was getting ya a big srprise fer fathers day to. I can't tell ya what it is but it is reel cuddly and goes (meeow).

Oh, I done red this note again that this Mary Jane writ to ya and I feel sur she just wants a cow-hand cuz I know fer shur her husban died cuz she worked him to deth. He was darn yer 92 an she still had him a plowin' the felds an takin' care of all them ther farm animels.

Don't fall fer her nunsense Billy Jo Bob cus you is way to smart to fall for that kind of stuff. She is jus tryin' to lure you inta her trap.

Carolyn might nag n' cumplain but at least ya know which side of yer bread is buttered on wid her.... Take Care.....

                                           Yer Concerned Neiber,,   Emma Lou



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